Lyrics:
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I don't care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car,
Through my trials and tribulations
And my travels through the nation
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far
Chorus:
Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
I'm afraid he'll have to go,
His magnets ruin my radio
And If I have a wreck, he'll leave a scar
I don't care if it's dark or scary,
Long as I've got the virgin Mary,
Ridin' on the dashboard of my car,
I' got Mathew, Luke and Mark,
Holy hell, they glow in the dark,
Riding on the dashboard of my car.
Chorus
Riding through the thoroughfare,
With his nose up in the air
A wreck may be ahead, but he don't mind
Trouble coming, he don't see,
He just keeps his eyes on me
And any other thing that lies behind.
Chorus:
Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Though the sun that shines on his back
Makes him peel, chip, and crack
A little patching keeps him up to par
When pedestrians try to cross
I let them know whose boss
I never blow my horn or give them warning
I ride all over town,
Trying to run them down
And it's seldom that they live to see the morning
Chorus:
Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
His halo fits just right
And I use it as a sight
And they'll scatter or they'll splatter near and far
When I'm in a traffic jam
He don't care if I say "Damn"
I can let all sorts of curses roll
Plastic Jesus doesn't hear,
For he has a plastic ear
The man who invented plastic saved my soul
Chorus:
Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Once his robe was snowy white,
Now it isn't quite so bright
Stained by the smoke of my cigar
If I weave around at night
And the policemen think I'm tight
They'll never find my bottle, though they ask
Plastic jesus shelters me,
For his head comes off, you see
He's hollow and I use him for a flask
Chorus:
Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Ride with me and have a dram
Of the blood of the Lamb
Plastic jesus is a holy bar
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